Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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