Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
