Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Randomize
