He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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