The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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