I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
