And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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