Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Randomize
