Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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