also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
