Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
