i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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