Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
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