His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Randomize
