I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I don't think brook has ever known best
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
