I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize
