Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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