Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Green mimosas i think yes
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
