so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
