why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
