im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
home. puking in laundry basket.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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