dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize
