I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
