Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I need to calm my uterus...
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
