dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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