Nicole vs. Life
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
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