So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Randomize
