i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
