the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
