so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize