so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
