She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
