sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
