New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize