he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Randomize
