i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
