So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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