who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
