Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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