Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
that may or may not have been my penis.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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