Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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