How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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