I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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