Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
