dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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