i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
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