i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
