my vag is so smooth its legendary
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Can I color on your dick again?
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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