Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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