did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
and she was petting her beer can
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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